Amazon Uranium reviews
The first page of reviews for the Uranium Ore for sale on Amazon is gold – "This is a great product but for any serious application, you must also buy this :Oxo Good Grips Salad Spinner. This is so you can centrifuge it and increase its applications. " and “I purchased this product 4.47 Billion Years ago and when I opened it today, it was half empty.” and
In preperation for the upcoming zombie apocalypse I bought this Uranium to give a little extra “umph” to the Miracle Grow that I usually spray on my garden. Being able to garden in the middle of the night was an unexpected benefit of this miracle product. The vegetables started to glow beautifully which made them easier to pick, however some of the little buggers do try to bite me while I'm working. I told my neighbor that he was welcome to anything in my garden not realizing how territorial the tomatoes had become. They didn't recognize him and he lost an arm. Fortunately he gained a tentacle in its place so it's all good.
(Thanks Sarah)